


A Study in Losing Everything

by StardustGay



Series: A Study [1]
Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Break Up, But a dick who respects authority and is secretly really awed, Character Death Fix, Flash gets better, Flash is a dick, Grieving and Determination, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, MJ does what she wants, Magic, Multi, Ned is a good best friend, New Superfamily, Parent Tony Stark, Peter and Stephen bond, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Shuri doesn't take any shit, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates are always romantic, Temporary Character Death, Tony Stark Has A Heart, but they don't always work out or stay together, future superfamily, redemption arc
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-04-30 23:22:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14507697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StardustGay/pseuds/StardustGay
Summary: When Thanos snapped his fingers the stones's magic latched onto Earth's soulmate bonds, and the half of the population that disapeared was one half of each soulmate pair. Earth is in mourning, but Earth's mightiest hero's are determined to reverse it.ORTony Stark is building a life with the woman he loves when his soulmate barges in with an apocalyptic problem. Not long after, half of the universe's population is gone and that includes Tony's soulmate and the boy he views as a son, leaving Tony alone and with nothing. Now Tony has to shoulder the weight of his grief and facing the knowledge that to bring back his loved ones he has to go against the most powerful being in the universe. Again.||HIATUS 2/14/19||





	1. The Dust Settles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Other chapters will be longer, I just wanted to get this out.

Tony could still feel the weight of Peter in his arms long after he's gone  _(gone, Peter is gone)_ and he can taste the ash in his mouth. Of the seven heroes that were on Titan, he's the only one left and the wind is still blowing around the ash they turned into. He numbly falls to his knees, debris digging into his skin where his suit no longer covers him, and he vomits, replacing the taste of dust - _of Peter_ \- with the acrid sting of stomach acid.

The sun is setting over the wrecked planet, lighting up the rubble in a way that's far too pleasant for the tragedy that just struck. It stings his eyes and they water, the tears overflowing replacing the image of Peter clutching at him desperately as he disintegrated. Replacing the image of Strange falling away.  _It was the only way._ But it couldn't be. The only way couldn't leave Tony all alone.

He looks down at his exposed wrist where the black, elegant letters had always mocked him.  ** _STEPHEN STRANGE._** They hadn't mentioned their soulmate marks before he...Tony stands, furiously wiping at his eyes though it does little good. He needs to get home.

He looks around the rubble for a few moments, looking at the trash that had been pulled down onto the planet - or perhaps had been here even when Titan was still alive and bustling with people. Now there's nothing but death here. He spots a small, crashed and broken ship and heads over to it. He runs a hand over the beat up metal, armor retreating, and searches for a panel. It takes a few tries to find one.

Tony has found that he worked best during the worst moments of his life, and as he pushes his sleeves up and pops the 'trunk' of the ship he hopes that holds true. He doesn't recognize the alien tech, doesn't have a hope of fixing it, but he has to get home. He gets to work.

His body aches and he's dizzy from blood loss and hunger, but he pulls apart and puts together the dusty, one-man ship for hours, through the rising sun and his stiff, achy fingers. He hunts around the area for parts, uses what remains of his nanotechnology to fix places he couldn't and to light what he couldn't see. His shirt clings to him with sweat, his mouth is dry and tacky, but he can't stop. He needs to reverse this, there's no other option. He can't rest until he sees Peter smile at him again, until he finally sees Strange's soulmark.

He manages to kickstart it by nightfall, a cycle after he lost everything, and the sight of the junker lighting up with a red glow sends a rush of relief through him so strong that the world tilts. Or maybe that's his body trying to shut down.

Tony climbs into the ship, body melting into the leather like seats, and slams the door shut behind him. It takes a few minutes to figure out the controls of the ship but then he is off, speeding off the planet as fast as he's able. The hours it takes to get home are blank, he can't remember any of it. He just knows that the clumsy landing in front of Headquarters, his home, is an empty feeling. He climbs out of the ship with difficulty, and just leaves it, heading inside through a personal entrance to avoid any workers still there. 

The living room on his private floor is quiet and lonely. He heads into his room to grab his phone immediately, his mind racing with what he has to do next. First, he needs to call up help, before sleeping or eating or anything else. He circles back to the living room and sits down heavily on the large grey couch, already unlocking his phone.

The date that blinks back at him tells him he's been gone for nearly three days, and he has thousands of notifications. A good chunk of them are from Pepper, and he ignores the guilt that wells up in his chest. She can wait. He clicks on his contacts and sets to work.

Many don't answer their phones and he leaves a voicemail. He doesn't think about the fact that they could be dead or gone. Some don't own phones, or he doesn't have their number. But Bruce picks up.

"Tony? Is that you?" He hears filter through the phone. Bruce sounds tired, but not in pain or agony.

His voice is weak and raspy when he replies, he should have stopped for water. "Yeah, it's me. It's good to hear from you, no one else is answering."

"There's a good number of us here, we're in Wakanda."

What? "What are you doing over there? Did T'challa join the fight?" There are a few moments of silence.

Bruce's voice is suddenly thick when he responds. Tony refuses to think about why. "Yeah, yeah....he-he fought with us. We came over here with Vision, and Thanos came.."

"Tell me when you get here. I need every abled hero that fought at Stark Headquarters." Tony insists, running a shaky hand through his dirty, sweaty hair. He is a disgusting mess of dirt and blood and sweat and...ash.

There's a pause, and his hand clenches in his hair. "Bruce?"

"We can't. Thanos destroyed a good chunk of Wakanda, because we brought the fight here. All of us are helping with repairs to apologize." Bruce explains, sounding apologetic.

Tony's heart sinks, and he clenches his teeth. "Then come back as soon as possible! We need to fix this!" His voice breaks a little at the end, but he can't muster up any embarrassment.

"Alright. We'll be there within a week." There's a pause. "Take care of yourself, Tony."

He hangs up, and the thought of waiting a few more days to even start makes his soul pulse with pain. 

The phone rings nearly immediately in his hands, and Tony drags his gaze from the blank TV to the screen. Pepper's name flashes there, and he nearly hangs up. But he owes her an explanation, out of everyone. All he wants to do is take a quick nap before throwing himself into planning, but she, at the very least, deserves a talk. He flicks the phone image to answer the call, and her panicked voice blares through the speakers immediately. He winces, his head throbbing.

"Tony! Tony, thank god you answered, I've been worried sick you gigantic  **ass**! Where have you been? Why haven't you been answering my calls? I was worried that...Tony, What happened?"

She sounds utterly panicked, a mix of relieved and angry. He's weary deep to his bones, and he takes a deep breath.

"Hey, Pepper." He finally says. "It's been a rough few days."

The understatement of the century.

"Where have you been?" She asks again, more firmly, and he leans back on the couch.

"Space. It's a long story, but I had to board the spaceship that was here, and me and a team went to the planet Titan to confront Thanos."

"Thanos?" That's right, almost no one knows what had happened.

"Thanos is an alien who was hell-bent on wiping out half the universe. He gathered six stones, which were created with the universe, and it made him unstoppable. My team tried to take the gauntlet, which held the stones and allowed him to wield them, but we couldn't." He explains hollowly, mind slow and the words barely coming to him. He was so tired. Pepper is quiet.

"So that's what everyone ...everyone disappearing was about."

"Yeah." He gives a hysterical laugh. "He's the reason everyone's gone."

"I'm coming over." She says firmly. He shakes his head, unsure if he can handle that.

"Pepper, I'm not really-"

"Tony, I am your fiance and I thought you were dead. I'm coming over." He doesn't want to deal with this. Not now.

"That's not-"

"I am not staying home when the man that I love-"

"I found my soulmate!" He shouts, frustration boiling inside of him. Talking hurt, and everything was just too much. He squeezes his eyes shut and feels what little water we left in his body trail down his cheeks.

"I thought they died when you were a child." She whispers, shocked. The phone shakes, his body shakes.

"I lied." He answers, quiet and broken.

There's a long silence, before, "I'm coming over. Don't argue with me."

She hangs up and the phone falls to the couch. A sound rips past his throat and lips, a sharp keening sound he can't believe is coming from him. He drops his head into his hands and cries for several long minutes before he pulls himself back together enough to go get ready for her arrival.

By the time Pepper arrives Tony has showered and eaten, and he's sitting back on the couch in pajamas, skin bright pink from violently scrubbing the filth off of him. She arrives in a whirlwind of clicking heels and flowing blonde hair, Friday barely able to announce her presence before the elevator doors are sliding open and she's storming towards him. She's perfectly put together, as usual, dressed to impress despite the red of her eyes and her dark bags. She looks angry and hurt, but apparently, he looks just as wrecked as he feels because she halts in her tracks before she reaches him.

"Well, where is he?" She asks, and he can't stand the shaky quality of her voice. The question, however, is a punch to the gut.

"Dead." A shaky breath, the word as ashy as- "Pepper, I watched him...I watched him fade." He chokes out. He thought he was over the emotions, had them in check enough to not burst into tears every five minutes. He was wrong.

Her face crumples and she slowly joins him on the couch.

"He saved my life, and then he died. The bastard knew he was going to...and he didn't warn me..." He continues, despite wanting to curl up and never speak again.

"Was he everything you thought he would be?" She asks, and it's awkward, obviously painful for her to ask but she does it anyway. He laughs, and it hurts.

"He was nothing like I thought he would be. The man who came out of the portal? That was him. He's argumentative and flippant and thinks he's always right, and he's brave. So damn brave. And he's smart too, a doctor." It hurts to remember, his chest aching where his heart used to be. "And he was good with Peter-" A sob escapes, and he covers his mouth with his hand so hard his lip splits against his teeth. Pepper looks like just looking at him hurts.

"Peter? As in Peter Parker?!" She asks, caught off guard. He supposes that's the easier question for her to ask.

Tony nods, taking a deep breath. "Kid snuck on board the spaceship, he wanted to help. He did great, came up with a brilliant plan and he saved our asses more than once."

Pepper's breath hitches and she reaches out to him, hand wavering in the air. "Oh, Tony.."

He only just manages to hold the tears back. When will the numbness come?

"He died in my arms, Pepper. He knew it was coming, he fucking begged me to help and I couldn't do  _anything._ I couldn't save him and now he's dead!"

She grabs onto his hand and he can see she's crying. He grips her hand tighter, desperate.

"I have to fix it. I can't just...." He insists, and she's nodding immediately. The support reminds him why he loved her.


	2. Probabilities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't expect all chapters to come out this quickly, I am very irregular. Also all math in this chapter could be complete bullshit, I'm not a math kid let alone a genius. 
> 
> Peter Parker has an IQ of 250 in Amazing Spider-Man, but I lowered it because he's like 15. Doctor Strange IQ is made up, I couldn't find it.

When Peter wakes up, he wakes up shaking and crying. He can still feel himself coming apart, the horrifying knowledge that Thanos won and he was  _dying_. If only he could have gotten the gauntlet off quicker...

There's a cacophony of noise around him, screaming and shouting and panic so heavy he can taste it. For a brief moment, he thinks he's in hell, but when he opens his eyes its to a reddish-orange sky and rolling green hills. He squints at the sky in confusion, watching it glint and making out odd edges here and there, as if he was looking up at a glass ceiling. He slowly sits up, tears drying on his face. People are all around him, standing and sitting and running. But not all of them are human, there are aliens of every shape and size. He looks down at himself and finds he's still wearing his suit, mask clutched in his hand. He drops it and pats himself down. He's solid, and in one piece. He isn't even in pain, his injuries apparently healed. 

"Have you gained your bearings?" Someone asks him, and he jumps, whipping his head over to find the sorcerer he met with Mr. Stark staring at him. The man is meditating, hovering mid-air, his injuries gone as well. So it wasn't due to his advanced healing abilities, good to know. 

When he doesn't answer, the sorcerer tries again. "Peter, right?" He prods, and Peter quickly throws his hands up to wipe at his eyes, embarrassed at the situation he found himself in.

"Yeah, yeah that's me. You're the Doctor guy, aren't you?" He asks. Damnit, why does he suck with names so much? The man smiles, amused.

"Doctor Stephen Strange." He agrees. Peter thrusts his hand out, like Aunt May always taught him.

"Pleasure to meet you, Sir." He hesitates, noticing how Doctor Strange seems completely at ease. "You're pretty calm considering we just..." His throat closes around the words, he isn't ready to face that yet. He moves on. "Do you know where we are?"

There's a look of sympathy on Doctor Strange's face, and it's odd. The man had barely spoken to him until now, he had been nice to Peter but overall he had seemed like a detached, closed off man. Why was he looking at Peter like he knew him, now?

"Everyone who disappeared when Thanos won was sent here, instead of dying normally. We're in the Soul World, which before our arrival acted as a sort of purgatory for the souls of the righteous. It's a pocket dimension inside the Soul Stone." Doctor Strange explains, and Peter goes wide-eyed with awe, looking around again at the tall trees and foreign plant life. It was beautiful and unfamiliar, endless from the looks of it. The people and creatures are not nearly as cramped and crowded as _half the damn universe_ should be. He turns back to the adult, mind on full speed. 

"So the sky, that's the stone. Was this place already infinite or can pocket dimensions expand? Is there something inherently magical about this place that heals our wounds or was it something else entirely?" He asks eagerly, leaning forward into Doctor Strange's space. Curiosity was just what he needs to keep him distracted. Doctor Strange seems caught off guard before he laughs, a light sound that makes him seem younger, the serious expression lifting for the first time. 

"You are smart." He comments, and the praise warms Peter. He's felt like a screw up for ages, so an adult telling him he's done well feels great. 

"I have an IQ of 147." He says, proudly, before immediately worrying he sounded like he was bragging. People usually think he is. Doctor Strange looks utterly shocked, and he blinks at Peter for a few moments. 

"Really? That's genius level, Peter." He breathes, and Peter rocks back, defensive. People also usually thought he was lying.

"I'm not lying, I took the test again this year."

Doctor Strange smiles at him. "I believe you. That's very impressive, my own IQ is only 170."

Peter grins, blushing all the way to his ears, and looks back up into the sea of people if only to avoid staring at the Doctor. Suddenly, something hits him, and he frowns.

"How was it determined, who lived and who died?" He asks, and Doctor Strange seems startled by the topic change. Peter feels a little bad for the man, he knew he was hard to keep up with.

"It was completely random." He answers, but Peter's spidey-senses prickle slightly. He doesn't mention it, quickly -and clumsily- getting to his feet.

"Kid, what are you doing?"

Peter looks down at him, bouncing on his feet. "We need to find others we know, there's about a.... 0.0000032% chance we can find a human we know and a .0001% chance of finding a superhuman. That's a .032% probability one of us finds a superhuman we know, that can help us get out of here!" Peter insists, getting excited and antsy. Doctor Strange's eyebrows furrow. 

"What's your math?" He asks.

"There is roughly a current population of 7.6 billion people on earth, the average human knows 600 people, superhumans make up .0001% of earth's population by recent calculations." Peter lists. Doctor Strange nods, but replies,

"Your last calculation was wrong."

Peter's nose scrunches up in confusion. "I divided the number of people we know collectively by the number of superhumans."

"Which gave you the percentage of people we know that should be superhuman, ignoring that as superhumans ourselves our number is far higher. That's about 384 superhumans collectively we know." He corrects. Peter facepalms and groans.

"You're right! That probability is minuscule!" Hs sighs, but straightens up anyway. 

"Better get to work."

* * *

 

New York was already set to work cleaning up the disastrous mess from half the planet disappearing suddenly. The population was now below half thanks to the numerous deaths and accidents the 'Event' caused. Tony breathes in the New York air and watches crews haul rubble from the streets and into their trucks. It was like the Chitauri invasion all over again. He looks away and shoves his hands into his jean pockets, hiding the way they were tight in trembling fists. He passes two young adults on a street bench, eyes catching on the grave face of the news anchor on the smartphone they were bent over. 

" _ **There has still been no official explanation for the sudden disappearance of what calculations say was billions of people this Saturday. The President has refused to comment, and rumor says that the Vice President was one of those taken by the 'Event'.**_ " The anchor clears his throat and shuffles his papers. " ** _In related news, citizens are asked to report any loved ones that were taken to their local police station so they can compile a list-_** "

He moves on, out of earshot. His destination is up ahead, and the sight of the large apartment building makes his chest clench. Tony slips off his sunglasses as he enters, and just like everywhere else it feels empty and abandoned. He starts up the stairs. 

He doesn't want to be here, doesn't want to look May in the eye and tell her her nephew wasn't coming home. He didn't know if he could play the distant but sympathetic boss, if he could watch May break down and not follow her. But standing in front of the apartment door he knows he can't send anyone else to tell her. He takes a deep breath and firmly knocks.

...

Moments tick by, and there's no sound on the other side of the door. He knocks again, hard and echoing. And again. And again. And again...

His heart hammers in his chest, and after another round of knocking he's forced to face the knowledge that should isn't home. 

Calm down, Tony. She could be out looking for Peter. It's what he would have done. He takes out his phone anyways, his gut tells him it's so much worse. He deliberates between calling the police station or the hospital, bit eventually dials the latter.

"Hello, this is Flushing Hospital Medical Center." The woman in the other end sounds frazzled and tired. He spares a sympathetic thought for the hospital staffs around the world right now.

"Hello, I'm trying to locate someone. She isn't home and I don't know if she..."

"Yeah, everyone's searching for someone." The receptionist sighs. "What's her name, Sir?"

He turns around and leans against the door, closing his eyes. "May Parker."

There's the tapping of the keyboard for several, long seconds, and then a few clicks. When the woman speaks again it's quieter, sad.

"I'm sorry, Sir, May Parker passed Saturday at 7:45 pm. She's currently in our morgue awaiting next of kin."

His breath shudders and he lets his head fall back, knocking into the apartment door. Dead.  _This couldn't be happening._

"What..." He clears his throat. "What happened to her?"

"She was in a car crash, like a lot of people were right after the 'Event'. Are you her next of kin?"

"No, no. I'm a...family friend. May doesn't have any family left other than her nephew, as far as I know."

There was an understanding noise. "I'm sorry, Sir. Tell her nephew to come collect her things and identify her body before the end of the month."

He hangs up, breathing unsteadily and feeling pain well back up. May was dead, and Peter is alone. Truly an orphan. Tony would have to tell him when he brought him back - _he'd bring him back there was no other choice._ It was going to break the kid. Peter's too young, too bright for the foster system. Tony pushes off the door and heads back towards the stairs, determined. He dials a new number into his phone, and the minute the lawyer answers Tony is speaking.

"Michelson, I need the paperwork to adopt a child. He's 15, nearly 16, orphaned with no biological family left as of Saturday."

Michelson doesn't answer for a long time, but Tony gives the guy time to process. After all, Tony's asked the man to do some crazy things but this...

"Mr. Stark, Sir, have you thought this through?

He hasn't, but he's never been more sure of anything in his life. "Absolutely."

"Alright...well then, before you can adopt him you'll need to have a home study, parenting classes, and a mental evaluation. It'll take several months.

"I can't wait that long. Set up everything as soon as they'll let you, don't be afraid to throw my name and money around." He orders, walking briskly down the street. He has so much to do, and he still had to start planning how to restore the population.  _Keep busy keep busy don't think about it don't remember just keep busy-_

"Uh, I don't know Mr.Stark-" Michelson stutters.

"Get it done, I want that boy under my care by the end of the month!" He barks, drawing a few odd looks. He ignores them. They don't matter.

"Of course, Mr. Stark."

Next, he calls Happy, who's currently taking care of everything he needs. He's relieved to hear the man pick up, alive and well.

"Tony? Everyone thought you were...gone." Happy greets him, incredulous.

"Well, I'm alive and kicking, and I have some tasks for you. I need you to get a crew to fix up that storage room on my private floor, clean it out and make it into something more suited for a teenager's bedroom. I need it done by tomorrow. Also have the maid restock my fridge with healthy food, make it look like I cook and take care of myself. And make a deal with Peter's landlord, I want everything in his apartment untouched and there until I fix this." He rambles off, mind buzzing as he slips into the cool leather interior of his car. He starts it up and flicks the call onto his car's system, hands-free.

"What's going on? Does this have to do with Peter?"

"I don't need to explain myself to you, I'm your boss. Just get everything done and don't disappoint me!" He snaps, nerves fried and touchy. He regrets it almost immediately, and sighs.

"Look, Peter is gone. He disappeared in the...'Event'. But I'm going to bring him back, and he needs somewhere to go when I do. His Aunt..she was in an accident and didn't make it."

"So you're taking the kid in? Have you talked to Pepper about this?"

"Happy, get the room ready. Make it something the kid will like. I don't want any questions that don't have to do with getting the house ready for him. Alright?" He's bone-tired and drained, but before he hangs up he says, "And I'm glad you're alright."

It's a long drive home, and he just sits in silence after the call ends.


	3. Meeting at the Avenger's Facility

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for voting, and I'm sorry to those that wanted Peter with someone else. I chose the options of Ned and Flash because I felt comfortable writing them, I had ideas for arcs for both of them, and I liked the options of Peter's soulmate either being his best friend or his high school enemy.
> 
> In other news, I have pretty much the entire fic planned out so I should get it out faster than some of my others. This one will also be shorter, but the Sequel might be my usual length.

Bruce can see Steve working with a few locals, rebuilding the torn up land inside the barrier. The citizens are used to Steve now, used to the group of them and their abilities, so no one bats an eye at Steve hauling three wrecked trees over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. He calls out to him, coming over.

"Hey, Cap, I need to talk to you."

When Steve turns to face him he can see the dark bags under his eyes, and he knows Steve hasn't slept since they arrived. He isn't the only one, Bruce knows Okoye and Shuri haven't slept either. Natasha seems to be doing fine, but even when they were close he could never read her. Thor was pretending to be fine and was nearly inseparable from Rocket. 

"Bruce? Have you and Shuri finished those new defenses?" Steve asks, confused. He drops the trees into the rubble pile, and his hand immediately goes to his wrist, thumb rubbing the name there. Bruce pretends he doesn't notice. It makes sense Steve is confused, Shuri hasn't left the lab in days and Bruce has been locked up with her, making sure the girl is alright. He worries about her, and the way she never stops working, but he also stays up there because everything is so awkward now around his old team. He'd hang out with Thor, who he's closer with than ever, but Rocket is an asshole and Bruce doesn't like being around him.

"No, but we called it a day. Look, Tony called-"

Steve snorts, bitter. "And where has he been?"

All right then, it's going to be like that. "From what I know, fighting like us. I don't know many details, but he sounds wrecked."

Steve doesn't care, that's obvious. Bruce didn't really expect him to. He and Tony apparently haven't been on the best terms - he got the story from Rhodey, Natasha won't talk to him and no one else was there- but it's gotten worse now that Steve's lost Bucky again. Steve's gotten worse, Bruce barely recognizes him anymore. He's angrier and quiet, his moods volatile.

Bruce sighs and spits it out. "He wants us back at Headquarters. He says we need to figure out how to reverse this."

Steve's jaw sets, and he shuts down visibly. "This isn't reversible. I'm not going back."

"Steve-"

"They're dead, Bruce! Whatever half-wit plan Tony comes up with isn't going to change that." Steve seethes. Bruce scowls, sick of Steve's attitude.

"What Thanos did wasn't natural, it was too easy, too quick! It has to be reversible!" Bruce argues, stepping closer. Green shot through his veins briefly, but he's in no danger of turning. Hulk is silent. Steve glares at him, steps forward as well, bringing their faces close.

"And if it isn't?" He asks lowly.

"Then at least we did _something_. Are you going to give up before you even try?" Bruce asks, searching Cap's face. There's nothing, not a flicker. He backs up, done with arguing.

"Everyone else has already agreed, we're leaving tomorrow at 4, with or without you." He tells him, before shoving his hands in his pockets and walking off.

 

* * *

 

 

The lights of the tablet and his laptop sting his eyes, but the pain is familiar and easy to ignore. Information, everything he can gather and figure out, scrolls across the screen and he stares down at the blanks. The things he doesn't know. His desk is littered in papers and files, half-eaten plates and thousands of empty coffee mugs.

He kicks away from his desk, frustrated, and scrubs his hands over his face. His body is sore and stuff and his hair is wild from running his fingers through it. Tony knows he's a mess, has barely left his desk for days, but fear and anxiety pump through him every moment he isn't working. He can't sleep, wracked by nightmares. Everything he eats tasts like..., and he is dealing with the trauma the only way he knows how. But that familiar, desperate numbness was beyond his reach. He was half a man.

"Mr. Stark, the Avengers and guests have arrived." Friday informs him, her voice breaking the blanket of silence that had smothered the room, startling him. He presses a hand firmly against his beating heart and calms himself down.

"Thank you, Friday. Have someone take them to Conference Room 1, please, and take their bags to their rooms. Place any new faces in the empty ones next to the designated Avenger rooms." He orders, getting up and out of his chair with a little difficulty. His joints feel like lead, and he shakes them out for a moment. Friday agrees, and he makes his way into the bathroom, busying himself with making himself acceptable to distract himself from the reality that the broken remains of what used to be the Avengers waited for him. He scrubs away the evidence of his mental state, the sweat and tears and sloth. He imagines he's scrubbing clear his brain and heart, patching the holes and tossing the baggage.

But as he dries off, the maddening ache and despair are still very much present. He swaps the old sweats and tank top for a casual suit, and runs a brush through his hair. He brushes the old coffee from his mouth, avoiding his reflection the whole time. He knows what he'll see.

Tony hurries downstairs with his tablet, hands shaking with nerves. Inside the meeting room is familiar faces, mostly, but there are two strangers he doesn't know. Pepper is in there, standing at the front of the room, looking over the table and fiddling with her engagement ring. He looks away.

Steve, Natasha, and Rhodey sit in their usual seats, silent and obviously tense despite their casual postures. Thor and Bruce sit next to each other, which was new and baffling (have they ever even spoken?), while the two unfamiliar faces sit on either side. On Bruce's side is a young looking girl, likely Wakandan, with two braided buns, a large black shirt with silver detailing that hung from her figure, and a serious expression. It seems out of character, like when Peter was angry. On Thor's other side is….a raccoon. Wearing clothes and talking animatedly to Thor.

Tony walks to the center of the room, in front of the long black table, and a hush falls. Not that there was much noise to begin with. He grins, clapping his hands and falling back into his old role. It's hard to smile and laugh, but this isn't the first time he's hidden his grief in public.  _If you joke they won't know you're broken._

"Welcome, and thank you for coming! I have to admit, I feel a bit like a kindergarten teacher here. My name is Tony Stark, and I am the owner of this large and expensive building. Now would the class introduce themselves, please?" He casually states, mockery and bravado lacing every word.

Everyone is staring at him, and he's struck by how different everything is. It's been three years since the Avengers were a complete team, and two since the Accords split them apart completely. He's seen Rhodey consistently since then, but everyone else is like a stranger. Bruce is grey and tired looking, but he looks more comfortable in his skin, less nervous and skittish. He doesn't hide behind baggy clothes or glasses -where did his glasses go? And his ease with Thor is completely new. Thor himself had cut his hair and it is now dark, almost brown. He has a puckered scar over his right eye and despite his easy expression looks tired and lost. Natasha looks similar, other than her new bleach blonde hair, but something about her was more open, friendly. And Steve…he barely looks like the man Tony knew. He's angry and tense, hair a mess and a large beard covering his boyish looks. Tony wonders if he's changed too, if they look at him and see how the world weighs him down. He feels changed.

The raccoon speaks up, loud and obnoxious. "This guy always act like a moron?"

Only Thor laughs, but Tony doesn't take offense. Thor rarely meant to be rude or mean. There's silence for a moment, before Bruce sighs and sits up straighter. It surprises Tony.

"I am Doctor Bruce Banner, which all of you know. I hope." He jokes, and it eases some of the tension. Thor grins at Bruce, large and fond, before declaring,

"I am Thor Odinson, King of Asgard." His smile falters. "Of what's left of it, at least." Bruce pats Thor's hand on the table, and he smiles again, the brief glimpse of loss vanishing. Raccoon goes next, crossing his arms and kicking his feet -paws?- onto the table.

"I'm Rocket, and four years ago I went through the magical change of going from a wanted criminal to a hero."

The Wakandan girl gives him an uncomfortable and disbelieving look, and she wasn't the only one. From the satisfied smirk on Rocket's face, it's what he was aiming for. Natasha leans forward, casually placing her elbows on the table. In that effortless way she always seems to, she captures everyone's attention.

"My name is Natasha Romanoff, at least it is now." She says, like discussing the weather. It seems to be all she has to say, and it's perfectly ominous in a familiar way.

"I am Princess Shuri, of Wakanda. Thank you for hosting me in your home, Mr. Stark." The teenage girl says, smiling politely for a moment. Tony speaks up before anyone else can go.

"It's a pleasure to have you here, Princess. Not to be rude, but how old are you exactly?" He asks, purposefully watching his tone. He learned the hard way with Peter how defensive teens can be.

Shuri crosses her arms. "Sixteen. Do you have a problem with my age, Mr. Stark?" She asks shortly.

He smiles at her, a quirk of the lip. He doesn't want more teenagers in the line of battle, but saying no didn't work well last time. And who was he to stop someone, when from the look in her eye's she needed to work to escape the pain. Just like he did. "Of course not, merely curious. You are welcome to help and it's nice to meet you." Shuri relaxes, but Tony gets a few odd looks. Rhodes clears his throat, though he also shoots Tony a strange look.

"My names James Rhodes call me Rhodey. I am War Machine and a real-life cyborg." He clunks his prosthetics under the table. Nearly everyone smiles at the joke, and he looks proud of himself. Up until Steve speaks up, his bad mood souring the room.

"I am Steve Rodgers."

And with the introductions over, it was obvious how small their group is. Tony clutches the tablet tight in his hands, and looks them over again.

"Is this everyone?" He asks much quieter.

Bruce is the only one who meets his eyes. "Everyone left of the group in Wakanda."

"Where have you been?" Steve asks rudely, and the room takes a collective breath. Tony's smile slips, and he clicks in his tablet, flicking the first file towards the table. The tabletop lights up a glowing white, startling Shuri and Rocket. A planet hovers above the table, radiating a soft light and rotating slowly. The hologram's light illuminates the heroes around the table, casting shadows across their faces.

"This is Titan, Thanos's home planet. It's also where a team and I fought Thanos, likely before he headed to earth as he hadn't gained the mind stone yet." Tony explains.

"Why were you in space?" Rhodey asks, baffled. Tony swipes the planet across the table, shrinking it, and pulls up footage of Strange and Wong he took from his busted suit.

"This is Doctor Stephen Strange and Wong, they are sorcerers and the Masters of the Sanctum Sanctumoriam here in New York. They asked for my help after the out lovely Bruce Banner here crashed through their window from space, and told them the end of the world was coming. We fought one of Thanos's freaky looking children, Squidward," Tony flicks that footage up next, "However Doctor Strange got his ass kidnapped."

"Why did they kidnap him? Why not just kill him?" Natasha asks with interest. Tony slides through the footage to show Strange exposing the time stone, as well as pulling an image of said stone up.

"Doctor Strange is- _was_ the proud protector of the Time Stone, but hid it behind a bunch of spells so only he could access it. So Squidward took Strange into his ship, the large one hovering over the city, and I boarded." Tony shows them the video of Peter and him kicking the alien's ass, pausing briefly as it ended to let the pangs of loss pass. It's truly great footage, Peter's plan smoothly disposing of Thanos's kid and making them look badass in the process. He tears his gaze away from the still image of them it ends on and looks over the group. Steve's intently staring at the holograms projection, and something about his expression makes Tony uneasy.

"As you can see, thanks to a brilliant plan it wasn't hard to free Strange and take control of the ship-"

"Is that the Spider-boy I fought in Germany? The kid from Queens?" Steve interrupts, drawing everyone's attention. He's ramrod straight in his seat and deadly serious.

Tony's easy facade drops, "How did you know that about him?" He asks lowly, tensing. Peter was a complete secret, Tony made sure personally that no one could link him to Spiderman.

"We talked while we were fighting, and it wasn't hard to figure out he was young. It was wrong to recruit the kid in the first place, but what the _hell_ were you thinking of taking a child-soldier into space?!" Steve's voice gets harsher and louder as he speaks, until he's nearly shouting at the end. The anger drains away as fast as it filled Tony, and the accusation stabs through him, stealing his breath. He feels cold, and the looks the group is giving him don't help.

"What's he talking about, Tony?" Bruce speaks up, low and disbelieving. Tony's pale, and his fingers are shaking around the tablet in his hands. He clutches it in a white-knuckled grip and tried to breathe. _Child-soldier._

Shuri asks again, looking colder than he's seen her. "I too would like to know what Steve's talking about."

Two deep breaths, and he squares his shoulders. He hates the way people are looking at him like he's a monster. He _knows he is._

"Look," He starts, quiet and grave, "I made a mistake involving Spiderman back in Germany. I realized that the second he fought you and I took him home, didn't involve him again. But despite his age, Peter's still a superhero, still had the savior complex and need to help. He snuck onto that shipwithoutt my knowledge, and by the time I found out we were deep in space facing the very real reality of the end of the world. I didn't had time to turn the spaceship around and take him back."

He meets everyones eyes, the tension suffocating. When he reachs Steve's defiant, angry gaze, the man sits back one surrender. Tony takes a breath to steady himself, and switches over to a hologram of his team on Titan, ignoring the strange straightening of Rocket. He doesn't need to look at it, has stared at it long enough to memorize the way Peter and Strange stood next to eachother, Peter's mask off and looking so fragile to Tony.

"We took the ship to Titan to take the fight to Thanos, catch him off guard. We weren't the only ones with the idea and met up with the Guardian's of Galaxy. We devised a plan to remove the gauntlet. It almost worked, too. I wont play this video, it's far too long, but you'll each have copies. Quill, this guy here," He clicks the screen and a projection of Quill materializes next to the glowing Titan. "Was overcome by anger when Thanos told him he had killed Gamora, the girl he loved, I believe. Quill decked him and snapped him out of the controlled state we had out him in, allowing him to get free and fucking up our progress with the gauntlet and our only shot at winning. We were defeated."

A sound catches his attention and he looks up to see Rocket clutching the table. Emotions flicker across his face, and Tony can hear him swear under his breath.

"That's my team." He grumbles in response to thequestioningg stares. "I'm a Guardian, Gamora was too."

Thor pats him on the back gently, and Tony swallows.

"What happened to them? The team you fought with?" Natasha asks Tony, no emotions betraying her. His heart pounds, he feels like he's drowning.

"Strange, uh, gave up the Time Stone to save my life. Thanos left the planet right after." He says roughly.

Her eyes bore into his, looking right into his soul. His composure is slipping, ripping at the seams. He didn't realize retelling everything would hurt so much. That interacting with people would be so draining.

"What happened to your team?" She repeats, slower. He looks away.

"I'm the only one who didnt..disinigrate after the snap."

_I don't feel so good Mr. Stark_

There's complete silence, heavy and impenetrable, one born of shock and heartache. Tony can't bring himself to look at Rocket, clearing the table and tablet before handing it to Bruce. He sits, breathing for a moment.

"Bruce, would you go through what happened on your side?" He asks when the silence moved from mournful to stifling.

Bruce clears his throat. "I was with Thor and the Asgardians on a ship when Thanos's ship appeared before us. Why we were on a ship, that isn't my story to tell, nor is it relevant to this meeting." He informs the table, knowing the question burning in some eyes. "I had to shift into Hulk after that, but I knew Thanos was stronger than us. He killed half the Asgardians, and I was sent hurtling to Earth to warn everyone. I wasn't there for everything, after that, so, uh, Natasha should explain the rest." He hands the tablet over to her, and Tony notices neither of them look at each other. Nat stands and starts explaining their search for Vision in that easy confidence of hers.

Tony listens, he swears, but her voice fades in and out of the background as he composes himself. These people expect someone from him, and even with his issues he's going to play the part. Hide his soft spots from the world.

"We head to Wakanda-" Natasha is interrupted by the pleasant tones of Friday, and the newcomers startle.

"Mr. Stark, I am sorry to interrupt, however, there are three teenagers in the lobby and they are refusing to leave."

His brows furrow, racking his brain for a reason anyone would be here but coming up blank. "What do they want?"

"They are asking for Peter, sir." She replies, and his blood runs cold. Numbly, he's aware I the eyes on him, that his face must betray his shock and pain, but he's totally unprepared. Clearing his throat, he gives the waiting AI instructions.

"Have someone escort them to Meeting Room 3."

"Of course, sir."

He stands, the chair scraping across the floor loudly, barring his skull. He fakes a smile and adjusts his clothing. "Continue on, if you will. I've been recording this meeting and will review it later." He explains, before hurrying to the door. He only pauses to quietly ask Pepper to show them to their rooms when they finish. He doesn't meet her eye.

 

* * *

  
Ned Leeds paces the meeting room, his heavy steps loud and constant. It isn't a large room, only holding a sleek black table and six chairs. MJ sits on the table, her chin resting on top of her knees and her fingers worrying the frayed bottoms of her jeans. Her hair flies from the last updo iwas stuffedfs into, and there were noticible bags under her eyes. She watches Ned pace with disinterest, though her body is tight with nerves.

"We are so going to get kicked out! You guys are insane! You can't talk to Stark security like that! Any second now someones going to walk in and kick us out!"

Flash Thompson leans against a grey wall, nervously babbling at the duo. Despite his usual expensive clothes his hair is unstyled and sticking up from his hands, exposing his frazzled state.

"If they were going to kick us out a wouldnt be here." MJ monotones, eyes never leaving Ned.

"They're probably getting restraining orders! Or the cops! Because there is no way in hell Penis Parker actually knows Tony freaking Stark! Sorry to break it to you-"

Ned rounds on him, angry and uncontrolled. " _Don't call him that!_ " He yells, startling Flash. "You didn't have to come with us, you know, so just _shut up!_ "

Fladh's mouth hangs open, his eyes wide as he looks at the kid in front of him. In all the years Flash's known Ned, bullied Ned, he's never once lost his cool. There's a brief, fragile moment of still, before the door bangs open and Tony Stark saunters in. The teenagers stare, taking in the celebrity.

Tony wears an expensive looking suit, plain and grey with a white tshirt underneath, and the flat, grim look he wears is a jarring contrast to the man they've seen plastered around their school, on TV, on Posters and action figures. They all stiffen, and Tony's eyes narrow in on Ned. He takes a few steps towards the boy, who stands up straight.

"Fred, what are you doing here?" Tony asks, flippant and unhappy. Ned frowns, chin raising defiantly.

"It's Ned. And I want to know where Peter is." He demands. Flash is starstruck, eyes wide as he stares at the imposing figure of the superhero. He can't believe that Tony Stark is in the room, and is horrified at the way Ned spoke to him. He's stuttering out apologies before he knows what he's doing, attempting to salvage the situation, keep himself from being banned from Stark Industries.

"I am so sorry for him, Mr. Stark, he's clearly delusional and I tried to talk sense into him-"

Tony ignores him, locked onto Ned. "Why do you think I know?"

Ned fishes his phone from his pocket without hesitation, lighting up the screen and playing the black and white footage of Tony pounding on an apartment door. Tony is in front of him in a flash, yanking the phone from Ned and staring at it.

His voice is low when he speaks, intense. "Where did you get this?"

Ned doesn't falter, still standing tall and fearless. "I hacked the security cameras facing Peter's front door and the window to his room, so I can see when he comes home. Instead, I see you."

"You're the kid who hacked my tech!" Tony accused, pointing at him. Ned doesn't flinch, or show pride at the feat.

"I did. Now, where is Peter?" He repeats firmly.

Flash snorts, looking incredulous and vaugly panicked. "C'mon, there is no way Mr. Stark knows who Penis Parker is! You had to have paid him if something, go much did this stunt cost you?"

Tony releases an annoyed sigh, crossing his arms. He closes his eyes, asking, "What's the kid doing here?"

"Flash insisted on coming, a tried to low him a few times in our way here but no dice." Ned explains, enjoying Flash's squawk of offense. Tony nods towards MJ.

"And the girl?"

MJ interupts. "My name is MJ, and I have just as much right to find my friend as Ned." She glares at him, and Tony sighs again, weary this time. He seems to age before their eyes, becoming tired and worn. He rubs his eyes, red from lack of sleep.

"Peter was…was one of the victims of the 'Event'.

Flash jerks back, and MJ curls into herself, clutching her knees right to her chest. Ned doesn't look like he's breathing.

"It's my fault, I helped him get on the spaceship." Ned chokes, eyes wide with guilt. Tony grabs his shoulders tight, feeling them tremble under his hands, and brings his face level with Ned's.

"It was not your fault." He insists firmly, staring into the kids eyes, emotion bleeding through. "It wasn't. And I'm going to get him back." He promises.

"How?" Flash blurts out behind Tony, and the man turns around with irritation, ready to yell at the brat. But the teen's eyes are damp and he looks as devastated as the others. They look at eachother for a moment, Flash clenching his fists and trying to hold himself together. It's such a shift from the kid he first laid his eyes on. He repeats his question, voice shaking despite his false calm.

"How?

Tony pulls away from Ned and stands, clearing his throat and breaking eye contact.

"Go home, all of you. This doesn't involve you."

He shifts, turning to leave but not getting far before a voice stops him.

" _No!_ " Flash shouts, seething. Tony looks at him in shock. "I'm sick of people telling me that! Telling me to go home and forget! I won't! Peter is my _soulmate_ , loser or not, and I'm not going anywhere until he's back!"

Frozen, Tony stares at him, blinking as he tries to wrap his mind around the outburst.

"Peter's my best friend, I refuse to leave." Ned chimes in, firm. Tony looks over to MJ, who only raises an eyebrow, daring him to tell her to leave. He swallows around the clog of emotions, the long day.

"What about your parents? What will they think?" He's just grasping at straws now.

"My mom was taken too, and I don't have a dad." Ned counters, chin wobbling despite his proud stance.

"I can just tell my parents the truth." MJ smirks.

Flash sets his shoulders. "Mine are out of the country, won't even know I'm gone."

Tony, against his better judgement, finds himself nodding. He leads them out of the meeting room and down the long hallway towards the spare guest rooms. He just wants to curl up in bed, get this over with.

"Don't steal or break anything, respect the AI, don't tell any of your friends or social media followers you're here, and I have other guests here. You are _not_ to bother them." He lays down the ground rules, not looking back as he spots the rooms.

"Who?" MJ asks.

"Superheros."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I'm so glad some of you are enjoying. I love your comments so feel free to leave one. If you want to have an actual conversation about the story or just Marvel in general you can message me at stardustink on Tumblr, which is technically my author blog but I always forget to update it.


	4. Update

Just informing you all that due to a lack of passion and interest, as well as time, I'm putting this fic on hiatus. I'm not sure when I'll continue it, but if I do end up abandoning it I will post all my notes and plans for you guys to enjoy. Thanks to all my readers, I really appreciate you reading my work.


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